Remembering the World's Best Looking Midget

For Davy - 

When I first heard the news, I was just sitting down in my religion and philosophy class. I turned on my phone and became puzzled, I never got this many messages! Quickly and unfortunately, I realized all these people weren't just in a friendly mood and wanted to chat. I started panicking as I read message after message - "Nicole, something serious has happened", "you need to Google Davy's name right now.", etc.

Sure enough, our little Manchester darling passed away this morning. 

The Monkees, perhaps, meant more to me than they should have. They've been my four best friends for a long while now. Sure, I'm really young and I can't say it's been more than a couple years since I impulsively picked up their debut LP at Goodwill, but I love them just the same. Nobody's made me laugh and feel the way these fellas did; their music and their television show was addicting, particularly when I felt I was at my lowest. These guys never, ever fail to make me happy. 

When I heard they were doing a reunion tour, I flipped out. I got my mom to order my ticket (VIP, I might add) the hour they went on sale to the public! 2011 was a rough year and that show made it so, so much better. You just can't describe those lovely butterflies you get in your stomach when you see your favorite band perform, and I had them for weeks after.

I was fortunate enough to meet both Davy and Peter after the show. I'd heard so many things -- "Davy's a prick, don't expect much from him!" "He treats his fans horribly!" etc -- and I'd listened to them. Though after a stunning performance like the one he gave that summer night, I was sure he couldn't be THAT awful. As I wobbled up to him in my ill-fitting and too-high heels, I (surprisingly) looked down at a tiny older man who smiled at me and motioned to come closer. This was Davy Jones. This was the little guy that won the heart of every teenage girl from '66 to '68. And, boy, was he adorable. 

Maybe I just got lucky that night, but Davy couldn't have been sweeter to me. He was all smiles and even got a little mouthy to the security guards for not letting me use my camera, all in my defense. What a prince. He put his arm around me and the photographer snapped our picture. I was told to move onto Peter. That was that. He signed my ticket and my few moments with Davy were over.

Davy Jones was a hell of a performer -- maybe not the best vocalist, but the only one I'd want singing "Daydream Believer" and all those other cheesy ballads all of us love to hate. He was the butt of his own jokes, standing at 5'3'' and he spoke a charming Manchester accent through his nose. We all made fun of him at some point, I did and I know you all did, but we all loved him as well. If nothing else, he was one hell of a heart throb, I can still hear teenage girls sighing in unison as "The Day We Fall In Love" starts playing. And wherever he is now, be it Heaven or reincarnating into a kitten, I hope he's still singing and performing cheesy dance routines. 

I love you, man, I really do. 

RIP Davy Jones. December 30, 1945 - February 29, 2012.

 ♥♥♥♥♥♥

During last period today, we were told to come up with 6 word memoirs --

This is one of several that had I come up with:

 "... with the exception of your eyes."

Middle school isn't a breeze for anyone with a brain (am I going to get heckled for that?) and I constantly found myself the butt of everyone's jokes. My interests were incredibly strange in the eyes of my peers and my looks didn't meet their expectations by any means. The cowards that they were, they used the internet as their weapon of choice. It sounds so silly and trivial now, but I'd get messages constantly from anonymous teenagers that claimed they went to my school. These were never kind messages -- always something about how they thought my jeans were a weird color, how I was "actually a really hideous girl" (I remember that message quite well!), my weight, or how my taste in music was less than acceptable. 

But these messages always ended the same way; "but you have gorgeous eyes!" 

Thanks, that definitely makes up for the bullshit you put me through up until junior year!

"With the exception of your eyes" summed up nearly my entire school career up until this point. Fortunately, I've moved on. I still enjoy referring back to my less-than-cheerful past to make me feel more secure within myself presently, but these are things of the past. Sure, I'm still hyper sensitive, that'll probably never change -- but, I've learned to move on and pity those (and try to help them when I feel is necessary) who need to put others down to make them feel secure with their own character.

I've grown a lot since middle school -- hell, I've grown a lot since last month -- and, honestly, I'm incredibly thankful that I didn't breeze through most of my school career. Who would I be now if it weren't for these experiences?

My All-Time Favorite Albums (as of now)

That's all for now, folks xx

An Ode To Eating Healthy

Now, I'm no health expert, but I do know what food is good and what's bad; I do know how much exercise is enough and I do know that I've felt so much better in the past month than I have in a while. While, no, all of my problems have not magically disappeared and I haven't remarkably lost fifty pounds within the past month -- I do feel so much livelier and more confident. Only ten pounds (only?) have been lost within the past month, and that is good enough for me. I'm not seeking to accomplish this quickly and easily, but with the addition of more exercise and a limit on carbohydrates, I  imagine could lose the weight much quicker. It's time to step it up.

I didn't eat badly to begin with (unless our limited budget condemned us to it), but with the removal of frozen party pizzas and occasional fast food, limited portions, brown rice, the addition of 8 cups of unsweetened tea and/or water per day, and around 50 sit ups each night, I truly do feel so much better and I do know I can do this. Temptation hasn't been an issue, and I have not cheated on the "diet" once. It simply isn't an option.

Mexican-inspired chicken, brown rice, white beans and vegetables that I made a couple weeks ago.

January 28, 2012

As sun is a rarity around these parts, Grace and I decided to take advantage of the situation and head downtown with very little money and my camera. The only thing I bought that day was The Doors' LA Woman album.

style icons and pretty ladies I wish I was

Pattie Boyd, Nancy Sinatra

Linda Ronstadt, Phyllis Barbour-Nesmith

Pamela Des Barres, Marianne Faithfull

Janis Joplin, Lulu

Grace Slick, Jane Asher

The Like, Brigitte Bardot

 & countless more

These are songs I affiliate with a certian memory. Music plays a huge role in my life, as you may have noticed -- while most of my favorite songs hold special memories for me, these seem somehow slightly more significant. Here goes nothin' -- 

"Of Moons, Birds, & Monsters" - MGMT

I listened to MGMT frequently both to and from Disneyland during the summer of '10. While most of the songs off of both Oracular Spectacular and Congratulations hold special meaning to me, this song still sends shivers down my spine. On the way home from Disneyland, I declared "Moons, Birds, Monsters" my favorite MGMT song and proceeded to listen to it on repeat for almost the entire ride back to Oregon. Within those versus and that stunning, almost  too-long guitar solo, I can still feel that California sun penetrating my poor $5 sunglasses, the feeling of emptiness and somehow, simultaneously, complete and utter completeness as we drove out of the Disneyland Hotel parking lot.

"To catch a monster, you make a movie; set the tempo, cut and cut its brains out"

"I'm Happy Just to Dance With You" - The Beatles

By the end of 2010, my musical tastes had "wisened" up a bit -- no longer were alternative rock groups strumming two chords, giving themselves whiplash flipping their hair from their face every two minutes -- in their place was The Beatles. I hadn't grown up with The Beatles and, unfortunately, I had to build my knowledge from the ground up, you know, start from scratch. My first favorite album was A Hard Day's Night and my first favorite track: "I'm Happy Just To Dance With You". George was immediately my favorite -- from the awkward speech impediment to that handsome face and crooked teeth... I really liked this kid! Though my Beatles-worshipping phase has ceased quite a bit, I still have a soft spot for this album. Black Friday, 2010, I walked to FYE (in the snow, mind you) to buy a DVD copy of the A Hard Day's Night movie. The movie ended up not being on sale (50% off DVDs my ass!), but I bought it regardless. Despite the seemingly boring plot and strange, Liverpuddlian humor, that DVD remained in my television all winter long.

"Take a Giant Step" & "Papa Gene's Blues" - The Monkees

Sometime during the summer of 2010, I bought my first vinyl LP -- The Monkees' self titled, debut album. More of the Monkees, their sophomore album, was the only Monkees I had heard thus far, and I was unsure of exactly what I was getting myself into. The first track was "The Monkees Theme Song". I accepted their show as some kind of Hannah Montana nonsense and went on my way. As I carried that LP out of the Goodwill store in which I had found (and bought) it, I had no idea how much these four long haired weirdos would mean to me in a matter of just a month or two. Oregon weather spares no mercy -- clouds block the sunlight and rain projects from the sky almost all-year round. Lacking vitamin D and with the help of some school related injustice, I was an emotional wreck; I was feeling exactly like the lyrics in "Take A Giant Step". Distinctly do I remember creating a playlist of just these two songs -- a melancholy song, describing word for word how I felt, and a cute Nesmith love tune, a feel good tune. These two songs would help me battle through any internal, emotional wars I fought with myself over the next year or so. In fact, I still turn to these songs when I'm feeling less than great.

"Don't sit in your lonely room, staring back in silent gloom; that's not where you belong"

"Silver Moon" - Michael Nesmith and the First National Band

I love the desert. Over the summer, 2011, I was living with my dad and step mom in a house on the edge of Las Vegas, Nevada. We'd often go out to eat, go to Walgreen's, go places at night in general -- the desert night sky is one of the most beautiful things a person could witness. Without mountains, trees, or clouds obscuring your view, you feel as though you can see into space itself. Oregon is a claustrophobic place to live; nature trapping you in and clouding your thoughts. Every single time we'd drive anywhere during the night, I'd listen to "Silver Moon" repeatedy. Nesmith has this way with words -- he can capture any moment in time flawlessly, even if that moment isn't his own. This song truly enhanced what was already phenomenally beautiful, the clear desert nighttime sky. While in living in Vegas, I was taken on a three day vacation to San Diego, California. Our cute, dingy, little motel was almost right on the beach and I absolutely loved it. The weather was gorgeous in San Diego, not quite as powerfully as in the Nevada desert, but you get the picture. This song, once again, didn't fail to enhance an already gorgeous scene.